I had to write a rhetorical analysis on an essay called "Hateful Things" by Sei Shonagon. Now, I've never written a rhetorical analysis. And, honestly, I went to the type of college where professors said, "Rhetoric rhetoric rhetoric!" at me, expecting me to know what the hell they were talking about. (I wanted to respond, "I read And Then There Were None in my twelfth-grade HONORS English class. Don't expect me to know anything except that Agatha Christie wrote the great masterpiece of the British canon.") Anyway, I don't know how to write a rhetorical analysis, which showed in my shitty, shitty paper, but there was nothing I could do because no one will show me how to do things.
But the most frustrating part was the irony of the reading assignment. I wrote a sentence this sentence: "Shonagon's list of hateful tings includes actions and behaviors that are almost universally disliked." The professor underlined "are almost universally," and above the first paragraph he wrote in red ink, "Do you dislike everything she mentions?"
I wish I could have responded, "Yes."
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